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Friday, June 11, 2010

Valentine Ojo - the Drama on the Curse & The Stubborn Reality

Lavonda Staples



One more thing.  All we can talk about are events, places, public persons, and ideas.  The next category would be yourself.  I know that you are from a diplomatic family from Cameroun.  I have read many of your posts and you are SO knowledgeable (hope that's spelled correctly)!  Why waste time on Val Ojo?  I have talked about personal things in forums on several occasions but I have NEVER made them personal.  That's just one of the downsides of being a girl.  The boys can talk about us like dogs but the girls must not say anything in public - it lays our nakedness too bare and makes it far too common.  Plus, you just end up sounding like a bitter, Black, b(*&h.  You don't accomplish anything.  Tell Val Ojo what you don't like about him in private.  But let that be it.

You have so much to offer that I find myself wondering if the same lady writes the posts.  There is a political Evelyn of whom I enjoy cheering onward and then there's this other sad, nasty, mean spiteful little girl.

Get over it.  Daddy is not going to give you a pony.  No prince is coming.  You can be too rich and too skinny.  And there's no such thing as Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny. 





In the realm of normal humans, Val Ojo embodies the song of Prince Nico Mbarga "a bended tree cannot be straightened." No fault of his, the genesis of the curse is obvious. Dashed by his own parents to the highest bidder, he was trafficked and reared to perform chores in a German household, what he sincerely believes was adoption of him. At puberty, he forfeited his right to any consequential discourse on Africa in general and Nigeria in particular. How does a dude discuss war when he was in bondage? The flashbacks will hunt him forever. Sorry to offend well meaning people, but Ojo is a perfect nuisance everywhere he goes with gutter abilities.

What able-bodied African goes to the highway, flags down alarmed motorists to broadcast details of his life?  My cell phone rang at 2:00 am. It was Val Ojo - at first solicitous, explaining why he was not active on the nets and he had no electricity because of  the wind.

Me: Peplexed, half annoyed at the time of the call but thinking a human being was in grave danger, I asked: How can the winds affect your electricity, there is no reported storm?

Val Ojo: In his usual subconscious foulness, he screamed - are you also an ashewo like my wife?! Or is this an African bitch conspiracy. Do you understand she piosoned me?

Me:  Alarmed at the strange and hostile call,  I asked to call him on my land line with a recorder. I did and told him: Listen,  you have to respect yourself and I have the right to hang up on you. I have no idea why you called me, who gave you my cell number, and how asewo is linked to electricty and the wind. I have no idea who your wife is and where you even live. I have never seen you in my life and did not know your number. My first idea of you was when you sent me a mail to join some African thing and indicated Pa Fru was a member. I just know you as a subscriber to forums. Do you understand me?

Val Ojo: Ignoring my statements, he cut me off. Why is she in competition with the Joneses? She enrolled my children in a (inaudible) school and I want them removed, she buys items because our neighbors do and without my consent, and all these affects my child support. And the judge agreed with her. Hell, her mother must go. I am the head of the household. She is in conspiracy with the judge to make my children like dysfunctional black families. I am calling you because I heard you have access to the radio.

Me: So you want me to do what? I still do not understand what you are refering to.

Val Ojo: Note my side of the story. I have called Democracy Now and that stupid bitch would not return my call. I have also talked to newspapers. Matto knows my story.

Me: Okay, so this is not a private conversation, you want to tell your side of the story? Why don't you wait until tomorrow.

6:33 am, Val Ojo called.

Val Ojo: Did you check with the radio? I even forgot to tell you that I had taken an eviction notice for my mother-inlaw to leave and she came back, sneaked in through the back door. My wife went to the court and took an eviction notice and the police came and threw me out in my own house!

Me: So how come the wind cut your electricity if you were thrown out? Doctor, you took an eviction notice to throw your mother in law out? Are you not the one writing about African values?

Val Ojo: At this point what was supposed to be a dialogue with a rational person became a Greek and Latin composition. He ignored any question, pressing on his story:  Yes, I contributed to her damn visa, I can seize the passport. I am in a tent; come and see for yourself. It was even in a newspaper. My wife and myself were happlily married, she obeyed me until the mother came and put ideas into her head. I should not have married a crude and useless Igbo woman. We Yorubas have a respectuful culture.

Me: Doctor, I am writing all these but I can almost gurantee you that this is not the type of stuff for public radio.

Val Ojo: What are you taking about? You are taking side with Agatha? You can call her and let her come and explain where in Africa does a woman wear the pants in the family and disobey her husband. Is that how you were poorly trained?

Me: Doctor, I cannot call her on such a thing. You have gone back to mindless insults. If you are talking to me as a prostective trainnee on your Yoruba or African values, you may as well hang up before I do. You said you wanted me to facilate a public interview for you. I am trying to tell you that there is something called audience consideration. What do you think this falls under? African education, culture or what?

Val Ojo: It has a foreign policy component and it  shows that pimp of a judge does not know the law and does not understand African values.  He believes we are akakats and Americans believe blacks are dysfuncional and that is why they would throw a father out and my children will grow as akatas without family values. I don't even have the money for the rate of child support but my stupid bitch and low-life wife, a wannabe, does not realize the long-term effects with her crazy mother.

Me: Where is the foreign policy in these?

Val Ojo: I can petition and make it an international crisis. Obasanjo can sever ties with the United States for the mistreatment of Nigerians.

Me: Doctor, maybe you need to contact other members of your family. Is that not how Africans usually settle domestic matters? Why do you need public media? I got to go now...maybe talk to you later.

Val Ojo: Look, she has relatives here and in Canada, and everybody has (inaudible)

Me: I have another call, I've got to go, have a nice day.

There were four sessions - encounter with a mad man. The next three provide insights into a sick and sad mind.

Have a wonderful day everyone.
MsJoe

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